A few days ago, I was maliciously rear-ended. At first, I was very angry, but then I came across the "Empty Boat Effect" in psychology, and I felt at ease. Sharing it with everyone.


In psychology, there is a term called: the Empty Boat Effect, which can solve over 90% of your mental and emotional problems in life.
Zhuangzi told a story: You are crossing a river by boat, and suddenly another boat crashes into yours. If there is someone on that boat, you will definitely curse loudly: "How do you drive? Are you blind?" But if that boat is empty, no matter how bad your temper, you will just wave your hand, accept your bad luck, maybe mutter a few words, and then continue on.
The same collision, why is the reaction so different? Because the empty boat has no one on it, you can't find someone to vent your anger on, so your anger naturally dissipates. This is the "Empty Boat Effect."
What makes you angry is often not the event itself, but your attribution to that "person."
Ninety percent of life's troubles are actually because you treat the other person as an "occupied boat."
A colleague unintentionally says something, and you think they are targeting you;
Your partner forgets an anniversary, and you think they don't care about you;
A friend doesn't reply to your message promptly, and you suspect you have offended them somewhere.
Once you see the other person as "deliberate," your emotions have a target—anger, grievance, complaints follow one after another. But if you see the other as an "empty boat," they are not targeting you; they just made an unintentional mistake, or they are tired today, or they have their own difficulties. Your anger loses its fuel.
In the world, there is actually nothing to be upset about; it's just ordinary people disturbing themselves.
Many things, from a different perspective, are not worth getting angry over.
The Empty Boat Effect is not about enduring silently, but about stepping out of the victim mentality of "he owes me."
Once you stop interpreting others' words and actions as targeting you, your emotions are no longer hijacked by external factors.
A change in mindset, and happiness and sorrow will follow.
How others treat me is my karma; how I treat others is my cultivation.
You can't change others, but you can change your view of others.
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